Dust Jacket Dispatch

Ardeo + Bardeo

Cleveland Park, Washington DC

I never imagined that I’d write these words: make sure, if nothing else, you order the brussels sprouts ($7). Your small plate will have a pile of seasoned, crisp-tender sprouts, split in half. They’ll be resting on a bed of tangy yogurt, showered with finely diced apricots, and dotted with pistachio pieces. It may be the first time that a vegetable dish will be the most fought over plate at your table.

While you’re enjoying the modern decor (everything is very square and angular: from the frames to the tables to the plates to the cubes lining the walls that are filled with), have yourself a glass of red. A tempranillo, perhaps. It goes nicely with an order of steak and fingerling potato bites ($6). There’s a base of crispy fingerling potato. On top, bonded by a smear of horseradish creme fraiche, is a bite-sized square of steak.

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—Written by Grant Goodman

Tapas, as we all know, is the French word for “tiny Spanish bowls of porridge,” which, when translated once more into English, somehow becomes “more sangria, good sir.” At least, I’m pretty sure that’s what it means.

Jaleo, as I now know, means “good eats.”

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El Chucho

Right now, El Chucho has the best happy hour around. The Mexican joint in Columbia Heights has $4 drafts, a $5 house margarita, and half price orders of tacos. The tacos all come with two per order, which means that up until 6:30 PM, most of them are $2.50-$3.00 an order.

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Ping Pong Dim Sum, Chinatown DC

I have a problem, everyone. That problem, you see, is that I cannot stop eating dumplings. Dim sum is one of my favorite things on this planet. Carts of Asian food being wheeled around a restaurant, stopping off to ask you what you’d like? Steamer trays packed with dumplings, pork buns, and noodles? Hell yes.

Ping Pong dim sum has a new brunch option. All you can eat for $25 per person (only a tiny few restrictions apply) and all you care to drink mimosas for $15. With full access to the dumplings menu, everyone at our table went nuts, so here’s a breakdown of what you need to order. The top of the class is, without question, the spicy basil dumplings.

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Let’s face it.  Being a man often means that people have low expectations of what you’re going to bring to a party.  We grill meat, okay, but otherwise we’re known for bringing beer or a sad looking wing tray from the grocery store.  This year, here’s a quick and easy recipe that will put those other guys to shame.

Spicy Buffalo Dip

Ingredients:

2 blocks of cream cheese (softened)

3/4 cup of Frank’s Red Hot sauce (more or less according to taste)

1/2 bottle of blue cheese dressing (the higher the fat content, the better)

OPTIONAL:

1 bag Flamin’ Hot Cheetos

Directions:

1.  Preheat your oven to 350.

2.  In a large mixing bowl, add all of the cream cheese, hot sauce, and blue cheese dressing.  Beat with a fork/spatula/mallet/whatever you have on hand until everything is all mixed up.

3.  Transfer the mixture into a shallow baking dish (I use a 28x18x4).  Cover with foil.  Bake for 30-45 minutes, or until the dip is bubbling rapidly around the edges. 

4.  Let stand for 10 minutes.

5.  If desired, crush up an entire bag of Flamin Hot Cheetos until only tiny crumbles remain.  Just before serving, sprinkle crushed Cheetos over top of the dip.

6.  Eat with pita, pita chips, crackers, torn up sourdough, or spoons.

Russian River Brewery

Their name might stir looks of confusion on the East Coast, but on the other end of the forty-eight contiguous states lies a familiar face to the beer scene; a brewery whose hoppy ales define a veritable coastline. Russian River Brewing Company, a Santa Rosa, CA establishment, is fairly new on the brewing scene, brewmaster Vinnie Cilurzo gaining his emancipation by once-parent, Korbel, in 2003. Now however, Vinnie is free to do as he pleases and what he does is make damned fine beer.

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San Francisco at a Glance

During my seven days in San Francisco, I consumed enough calories to properly nourish three copies of myself. Between pizza, beer, sushi, pho, wine, Thai, wings, pies, chowder, sourdough, hummus, cookies, chili, barbecue, biscuits, and muffins, it’s hard to narrow my list down, so I figured I would do a quick run-through of my highlights. Here we go.

Devil’s Teeth Baking Company

10 minutes from the Pacific Ocean is this tiny storefront which is home to the best American-style breakfast item you’ll find in the Sunset District. Their Breakfast Sandwich is what you need if you’re having a long day of trekking through the city: a hot, flaky biscuit filled with fluffy scrambled eggs, gooey cheese, and bacon that I dreamed about later.

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Sticky Rice. H Street NE, DC.

This is a sushi spot with devastating tater tots. They are both tater-y and tottery and they arrive at your table inside of a shiny, metal bucket. A bucket! YES! And I’m not talking about a cute little pail that holds twenty tots. You could take this thing to the beach and make a full-sized sand castle turret with it. In fact, I’m not sure why the waitstaff doesn’t offer you a shovel as a serving utensil.

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Chef Monis putting the final touch on a dish at Dupont’s Little Serow

For years I’ve longed for the ability to dine at world renown chef Johnny Monis’ Komi. It’s consistently haunted me from atop the Washingtonian Top 100 list, but being a man of only moderate means the $150 prix fixe menu has kept me at bay. Recently, however, Monis has expanded and opened a new restaurant right next door. Little Serow strays from the Mediterranian fare that Monis has made his mark with and instead focuses on the fiery flavors of Northern Thailand and Laos.

And I am pleased to say that for $45 dollars, I may have eaten the best meal I have ever had the pleasure of enjoying in Washington D.C.

The first thing you need to know about Little Serow is that

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I’ve known about Surly Brewing Company for years now, their IPA, Furious, frequently taunting me from atop Beer Advocate’s best of lists. Though, as much as I longed to try it—to try all of their highly revered beers—I was plagued with the unfortunate fact that the Minnesota brewery doesn’t distribute to the Washington D.C. area.

So you can imagine how excited I was when last night Churchkey featured ten of their delicious drafts (two of which were on cask) for a one night only special event.

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It’s America’s only native spirit and while it might not seem as classy as Scotch whisky, Bourbon whiskey (American brews are spelled with the “e”) is often said to be as good if not better than Scotch. Hemmingway drank it. Lyndon Johnson drank it. Humphrey Bogart drank a lot of it. But how much do we really know about this iconic spirit? Here’s a few things I bet you may not have been privy to:

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Nando’s Peri-Peri

924 Ellsworth Drive, Silver Spring, MD

Nando’s has a side dish called Macho Peas. That, in my opinion, is enough to justify a visit to the place. Plenty of you, however, are going to want more reasons to dine at Nando’s and so, I’ll indulge you. Be warned, though, that these other reasons don’t involve the hyper-masculinization of green vegetables.

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Destination H Street

When people think of D.C. they think of The West Wing, politicos young and old breaking bread over PAC paid lunches. They think of the shopping Mecca, Georgetown along with its neighboring stodgy and stuck up neighborhoods that are filled to the brim with popped collars and over-priced food. And as much as these things are part of what makes D.C., D.C., treading the streets of Dupont Circle and the Penn Quarter will never give them an actual taste of the culture of D.C.

No, for that, they have to go somewhere else. I’ve been a long time proponent of the U Street, Shaw and Columbia Heights neighborhoods, but recently I’ve been spending more and more of my time someplace else. Some place authentic.

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Flying Dog Brewery

“Good people drink good beer,” or so is the world according to Flying Dog, an eccentric craft brewery tucked away in Frederick Maryland. George Stranahan and the boys behind the brew have been at it for over twenty years now (five in Frederick), and their level of knowledge, experience and exuberance shows in spades.

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